best kind of worst

by Lazarus Nance Letcher

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about

i feel like i'm making up for an intimacy deficit in my twenties. i cut myself off from physical contact for most of my life for fear of queerness being revealed. i know i'm not alone in this, a lot of us qt folx in our twenties are getting swept up in whirlwind highschoolesque crushes (scribbling your name on the back of my notebook as we speak. there's' nothing wrong with that. leanin into my hormones and learnin what this queer love business is

lyrics

i'm waiting for you to just say one word
i've heard just one can unfurl whole wide worlds
i'm ready i know i've got what it takes
i'm afraid you don't learn to flirt
when you grow up this gay

i've done this dance a dozen times before
for you my dears i'm ready to hit the floor
it's dizzying, dazzling, i'm tripping over my steps
and you know there's nothing
i'd rather do instead

so i'll smile
at my fear
responsible
for these feels
o it's the best kind of worst
a grown up crush is a curse

you'd bet i'd know it doesn't get much better
it's cycle,s it's seasons, it's circular reasonings
o a cardiac beating reminds me
i'm still breathing
o it's less about kissin
and more about feeling seen

my clutter closet
impossible to close it
o it's the best kind of worst
in queer love, i'm not well versed

credits

released April 4, 2019
Recorded, produced, and loved by Bella Trout

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about

Lazarus Nance Letcher Albuquerque, New Mexico

Go to my website to find my shows and talks!

www.lazarusletcher.com/blog/shows

Laz Letcher is a Black nonbinary trans musician based on stolen land in Albuquerque, New Mexico.
Laz's solo music tells the tales of their family, their people, and their joys/struggles. Laz performs around town as a solo artist and with queer indie folk band Eileen & the In-Betweens. ... more

lazarusletcher.com

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